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5-Minute Chats With Students
A structure and sample questions for one-on-one chats to open dialogue with students and learn more about how they are experiencing school
There are clear benefits—schoolwide, in classrooms, and for individuals—when staff and students have trusting, positive relationships, when the school is responsive to student input, and when students are elevated as partners in school improvement efforts.
Strong staff-student relationships lead to a greater sense of belonging and investment in school, improve academic achievement, and lay the groundwork for effective staff-student collaboration (Hallinan, 2008; Mitchell, et al., 2018). Staff reports of stress, emotional regulation, and connection with students are significant predictors of their students’ stress, outlook, prosocial behavior, academic achievement, and perception of teacher support (Oberle & Schonert-Reichl, 2016; Braun et al., 2020; Arens & Morin, 2016). Students who feel seen, valued, and supported will be more likely to share problems they experience within the school community and see possibility for improvement. When staff work in partnership with students to understand these challenges and develop solutions, it builds trust and helps expand students’ understanding of themselves as problem-solvers and critical thinkers who can make an impact.
Learning to build relationships with students, elevate their voices, and partner with them to solve problems and improve is an important aspect of educators’ social and emotional competence.
How can educators lean into the five SEL competencies as they receive feedback from students and …More
How can educators lean into the five SEL competencies as they receive feedback from students and collaborate with them?
SELF-AWARENESS → with a focus on identity
“My identities impact how I perceive and navigate the world and how others perceive me. It is important to be aware of this and continue to explore and reflect on this.”
Example: A teacher considers the impact of race and ethnicity, class, gender, home language, ability, interests, learning style, and other factors when reflecting back on their experience when they were a student. Knowing that their students’ experiences may be similar to or different from their own, they seek to understand student perceptions about school and themselves as learners; meet students where they are; and challenge, support, and inspire them.
SELF-MANAGEMENT → with a focus on agency
“I know I can have an impact and choose to act to improve conditions for myself and others. I will intentionally make room for others to act as well.”
Example: A school leadership team creates conditions where students can co-lead in the school environment. Students help to plan schoolwide assemblies and family events, create and administer surveys, and conduct focus group interviews to gather input and plan ways to improve the school. The leadership team shows they take student feedback seriously by creating structures, such as a student advisory board and participatory town hall meetings, that empower students to advocate for themselves and peers.
SOCIAL AWARENESS → with a focus on belonging
“I am best able to contribute when I feel I am valued, welcomed, and an essential part of this community. It’s important to support others to feel this way, too.”
Example: A teacher who has taught the same grade level and subject for a long time recognizes that the makeup of the school community changes over time. Each year during the first weeks of school, they do activities to learn about their new students and their unique interests and cultures and make revisions to their lesson plans to be inclusive and reflect the diversity of their new group of students. They devote time every week to community-building activities, ensuring that all students can share about their lives and feel seen.
RELATIONSHIP SKILLS → with a focus on collaborative problem-solving
“I am more effective when I listen to others to understand problems and share ideas to develop solutions. The process of sharing power and working together is important to get to the best solution.”
Example: A school counselor not only asks students for their perspectives, but also asks them about possible solutions and how they would like to be a part of the improvement process. They ensure that the administrative team communicates back to students what they heard and creates a plan to impact decision-making at the highest levels.
RESPONSIBLE DECISION-MAKING → with a focus on curiosity
“I lean in with courage and choose to learn about myself, others, and the world. It is important to be open to and seek new information and perspectives when making decisions.”
Example: A principal begins a problem-solving meeting with students and staff by sharing her belief that there is never one right answer to complex problems. Throughout the meeting she models curiosity by asking thoughtful questions, listening more than she speaks, and asking for the perspectives of others.
Building positive relationships with students is both a key skill for educators and an essential component of a healthy learning and workplace environment. Students who perceive that their teachers care about them, respect them, and support them are more attached to school, experience a greater sense of belonging, and invest in their learning more, which leads to improved academic outcomes and fewer disciplinary incidents (Hallinan, 2008; Mitchell, et al., 2018).
Teachers who report they trust students also have higher job satisfaction and report less emotional exhaustion and burnout (Van Maele & Van Houtte, 2015). When staff prioritize relationships, they create the context for students to discover who they are and what they value, take academic risks, and analyze the world around them.
Search Institute has created a Developmental Relationships Framework to help adults build strong, supportive relationships with young people. By sharing power, expressing care, and providing support to young people, all adults in the school contribute to developing students’ agency and sense of belonging.
SEL teams can support staff-student connection by:
A structure and sample questions for one-on-one chats to open dialogue with students and learn more about how they are experiencing school
Adults play a critical role in supporting connection and community among students, as well. To help nurture community, adults can establish shared routines and make time for community-building rituals that model care and compassion and help all students feel valued, respected, and assured that adults have confidence in them and their abilities. This creates a sense of belonging at school, which allows students to focus on leadership and learning (Darling-Hammond et al., 2019). Many SEL programs include community-building practices, and adults can also incorporate this focus into existing class meetings and discussions using protocols such as the one below.
Planning considerations, a set-up checklist, a recommended circle process and planning template, and four sample circle scripts
To learn more about creating the conditions for student belonging and emotional safety see Focus Area 3 > Belonging and Emotional Safety.
Empathy Interviews With Students Shape Approach to Improving School Climate
Students in Dallas Independent School District conducted empathy interviews with their peers, asking questions such as, “What does it feel like to belong somewhere?”, “When and where do you feel most welcomed and included?”, and “What do you want for the students at this school?”
Student leaders at schools across the district led a variety of projects to improve wellness and school climate based on responses. For example, at New Tech High School, students worked with staff to get permission and resources to build a Zen garden in an unused outdoor space to “benefit the students and teachers in having a more comfortable work space” and to “be a place where kids can really connect with each other.”
Students have unique perspectives that can improve the implementation of SEL from planning to evaluation. For students to participate fully in SEL work, staff need to ensure students feel connected, have positive relationships, and believe they’ll be listened to.
Perceived responsiveness informs the degree to which students believe it is worth their effort to participate in a student voice practice (Search Institute). Additionally, students tend to have better academic outcomes and lower absenteeism when they perceive that teachers and school leaders are responsive to their concerns (Kahne, et al., 2022).
Students should be part of the process of creating a shared vision, conducting a needs and resources assessment, creating an action plan, and collecting and reflecting on data to continuously improve. Young people can contribute to each of these stages in developmentally appropriate ways.
Ways staff can support and elevate a broad range of student perspectives and experiences as part of schoolwide SEL efforts
A student-led, structured process for students to reflect on data in partnership with adults, to observe trends, and discuss ideas for improvement of SEL implementation
Ways adults can create equitable space for students in their role on the SEL Team by preparing students to lead and adults to act as allies and mentors
For more information about and case examples for promoting student SEL leadership, see Focus Area 3 > Elevate Student Voice.